Alcohol Frenzy

I woke with a heavy head and a sigh
Gone were the signs of the happy high
Why does alcohol leave a hangover
Still there despite of 8 strong coffees and a hot shower
Yesterday’s party was quite rocking
Wonder if I did anything that was shocking
Dancing food and loads of fun
Then of course there was vodka whisky and rum
Gone with the wind is the glittery night
Morning I didn’t seem to be a pretty sight
With a heavy head I ask why oh why
Can’t I always be in that happy high

Appearances could be deceptive

Couple weeks ago a few of my friends called and we suddenly made a plan to meet. I was really excited since it had been ages since we had caught up. We planned to meet at a pub or lounge and catch couple of drinks, some dinner and head back. Now being a mother of two such treats are rare and you want to make the most of it. So I got dressed, reached the pub where we to meet. Moment I walked in I had people looking at me strangely. Reason- possibly I was the only woman in the pub dressed in salwar kameez. My friends made a small joke too…I laughed it off too.

However this incident just made me realize how much we stereotyped people basis what they wear. Girls wearing modern attire might not be homely or religious, someone wearing saree might not be modern or aspirational. Few years go I was to meet my husband’s parents  – this is before we got married. Now I am comfortable wearing jeans and tees most of the times , and I wanted to be comfortable when I met them more than anything else. As I was getting dressed my mom started telling me that this was not an attire that I should be wearing and wearing a salwar kameez or saree might be more ideal. Why do we decide that homely girls would wear salwar kameez? Does my attire have anything to do with my ability to manage home? For past many years I have successfully managed home, cooking, working and raising kids….so much for judging me basis my clothes.

We have stereotypes for everything- You need to wear “Indian attire” when you go to temple. Why? Does god love you more when you do? or do you suddenly become more devoted? There are temples in India where they don’t allow you in if you aren’t dressed “appropriately”. And who decides what is appropriate for me? Shouldn’t my dressing me a function of what I am comfortable in? Weddings naturally mean loads of jewelry and heavy Indian attire……then whether someone can afford it or not becomes secondary.

And these stereotypes aren’t limited to women, men can’t wear pink…must be a gay if he wears feminish colours. Boys like cars..heaven forbid of they like stuff toys or even boys don’t care about how they lookas much as giirls do.

In a society which we call advanced it’s disturbing that we should have such stereotypes and pass them on to the next generation too. We want the world to change around us…I guess we should start by changing our own beliefs and perceptions.

 

 

 

When work becomes passion

Smile on my lips and joy in my heart
As I get ready for work this is how my day starts
Everyday means a fresh challenge
Different problems and issues to manage
Every new study means some new learning 
Now thought of that it quite exciting
Smile on my lips and joy in my heart
As I get ready for work this is how my day starts
Some ask me what’s the secret of my satisfaction
I say to my love of work it’s a direct reaction
Do what you love and love what you do
Don’t be afraid to try even if you have no clue
Follow your heart’s passions
Then everyday is a cause for celebration
Smile on my lips and joy in my heart
As I get ready for work this is how my day starts

5 Parenting Tips

For past few days I have been reading so many posts and blogs which give parenting tips to “newer” breed of parents. So here it goes…let me add my two bits of wisdom. After all having two kids entitles me to give some unsolicited free advise to people.

  1. Stop projecting yourself onto your kids: This I think is the most common mistake all of us do. When we have kids we instantly start wanting them to have everything we didn’t. Assumption being that they want same things as us. We want them to be everything we couldn’t and this is where everything goes downhill. Let’s respect that our kids are individuals and they are not projections of us.
  2. Respect generation gap: Our traditions, our values are nice for the times we live in but let kids take tradition and mould it to fit in with times they are in. We can’t expect our kids to follow our traditions and culture blindly. Following it isn’t respect and not following is not a sign of disrespect to you. Newer generation will always have newer and maybe better ways of doing things respect that.
  3. Practice what you  preach: Kids are like sponge, they absorb everything around them. So be careful of what you say and do around them. If you want your kids to grow into strong minded individuals then be one yourself. Don’t wait for change to foster itself through them, be the change for them. You want them to be respectful then be respectful to them. You want them to eat everything then start eating everything yourself…i guess you get the drift by now.
  4. Remember that kids aren’t your property but mini individuals themselves:  We raise kids, we give them everything and in the process we forget that we don’t own them. They are individuals with their own personalities. As parents we are just mentors or guides, we can teach and guide about rights and wrongs in life but we should let kids make their own mistakes and learn from them. Its important to their growth.
  5. Don’t center your world around kids: This is very important and maybe contrary to what everyone says. World wouldn’t revolve around them and so shouldn’t their world at home. It’s good for them to see parents balance all relations and work in life because that’s how they will become balanced individuals themselves. Be there for them when they need you but don’t be overprotective. Real world can be good and bad and they need to know to deal with realities. Rather than shielding them from bad teach them to recognize it and then deal with it too. Equip them to face the world.

As parents we play a very important role, we have the power to bring about a great change by raising our kids to be strong, righteous and humane. But at the same time this power should not make you autocratic and over bearing. As parents its important to learn to let go…..let the kids free and let them blossom into their own personalities.

Arranged marriage

 

We might not know each other just yet
But here we are bound together by fate
When I saw you first time it might not have been love at first sight
But my heart said that you were just right
I want to know everything about you
Where do we start off I have no clue
We might not know each other just yet
But here we are bound together by fate
Wonder what are your dreams and passions
Everytime we meet do you have the same sensations
Your likes and dislikes I want to discover
Did you have any image of your lover
We might not know each other just yet
But we could be each other’s soulmates
Your eyes seem to say a thousand things
Your presence makes my heart sing
I might not know everything about you
But slow and steady we will make it through
Bound together by luck and fate
We were always destined to be soulmates

Love just caught me unawares

Without you life has no meaning
Words can’t describe the intensity of my feelings
I keep seeing you in every nook and corner
Every minute without you is a torture
My life has turned upside down 
Without you my smiles turn into frowns
Without you life has no meaning
Words can’t describe the intensity of my feelings
Sun doesn’t shine when you are not around
My heart is calling you can you hear the sound
I always was the practical one
“Love” was something of which I made fun
Wonder how did I end up like this
In your absence there is no bliss
Without you life has no meaning
Words can’t describe the intensity of my feelings
Loving you came so naturally
Everything just transformed magically

Devotion

Chants of hymns and bell chimes

Enticing you to be closer to divine

Little rituals and symbols to woo God

Whether we understand or not our heads we nod

Running from pillar to post in search of the divine power

Hoping by doing this his love he will shower

Trying to act humane and solemn

But little acts of kindness is a problem

Showering our devotion on lifeless stones

But for helping someone we groan

Alas sad but true he seems to have vanished

For seeing humanity and love he’s famished

He lives in our heart and soul

Yet we run from pillar to post

Maybe we need to stop all this

Before love and humanity we totally miss